Wichita, Kansas
OK, we’re making terrific progress here. Now is the time to take your tape — which should be sports or hypoallergenic — and apply it. Start by wrapping your penis with a piece of tissue paper or soft cotton to keep it comfy. Then, tear off a strip of tape long enough to pull both your penis and scrotum up between your legs and stick them to your butt. Apply the tape in front, pull everything and the kitchen sink back, and secure it to the small of your back.
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